Round 2:
Seeing as I haven't had any work to do since the beginning of the week, it has led my idle mind to wander. Ever since the two new born-again Christian secretaries signed on, God, his divine greatness himself has been the topic of the office the past few days. When I walked into work 15 minutes late today, the God-Squad was already assembled in the front lobby, talking about what preachers they listen to, etc.

This whole born-again Christian stuff is pretty wierd. The other day, as we were commemorating one of the VP's 17th anniversary on the job, I made some wise crack about a disassociative fugue and described what it was. One of the same God-squad secretaries made a crack about LSD in response. Now, from my experience with drugs and people who use them, generally people who haven't used a drug before don't bring it up in casual conversation. In other words, if she had said something general about "drugs," it would be far less suspect than bringing up the specific drug LSD. She's about the age of people who would've tried it to. Anyway, I am getting off topic. It seems to me from my interaction with Oklahomans, that a lot of born-agains start off their life being "sinful," doing drugs, drinking, promiscuity, the whole 9... Then all of a sudden at the age of say 50, they realize most of their life is over and they start thinking "OH SHIT... I gotta do something." In other words, becoming born-again seems to be a euphamism for mid-life crisis. And born again Christianity is so compatible with these people. All they have to do is say they found Jesus, and they are golden. Hey, I'm with JC, I'm a good person, I am going to heaven now. To put it mildly, the faith seems a bit insincere, but then again, I am saying nothing new or revolutionary. Self-delusion is a very powerful thing.

In any case, so I decided to enter the fray a bit with the God-squad, and I agreed with one of them, the same aforementioned VP, to read some book called "The Case for Christ." From what she's told me, a bunch of quack academics got together and tried to prove everything in the bible is true... kinda like one of those programs you see on the history channel. In turn, she agreed to read "The Brothers Karamazov." In any case, as I started to futily argue employing the tools of reason, all of the secretaries began to pity me and tell me how awful it was that I hadn't found God and faith. I told them I am Christian and I pray every night, I just temper my faith with a bit of reason. Which they jumped all over, and told me that I couldn't employ any reason in my belief system... no wonder Oklahoma is so fucked up.

In any case, this whole incident just strikes me as one of the many reasons why Oklahoma is fucked up and is fucking up our whole country. People believe if they belief in God, have faith, etc. God will do good by them, help them out, make sure good things happen to them, so long as they keep up the irrational belief that everything in the bible is ture. God created the earth in 6 days, etc... Aside from the fact that this complacency is driving America into the ground and preventing the American government from taking the necessary actions to stay relevant in the world, and make it so the rest of the world stops hating us, I find that these beliefs are a bit sickening in another regard. The rural born again Christians have effectively distilled religion and Christianity down to a quid pro quo. It seems to me, that a lot of Born-agains merely believe, because they believe that they will reep benefits from their irrational belief, but don't really ever make any effort to follow the tenants of Christianity. From what I have seen, born-agains are just as biggotted, close-minded and xenophobic as any group of people on the face of the earth, but they still are gonna go to heaven, and they're gonna meet Jesus at the gates, because Jesus likes them, because they like him. I'm not saying anything new or revolutionary. I think most of my friends from VA or the north are well aware of the hypocrisy of fundamentalist Christianity. The only thing that's really new is that I am surrounded by it every day.

I am starting to wonder how these people will react once America eventually hits terminal velocity on its inevitable downturn in economics and world standing. I can't wait to see the round-the-clock pray-athon as the dollar becomes de-valued and the born-agains can no longer afford to get massive Sonic triple bacon cheeseburger every day. Shortly thereafter, I predict the witch trials to begin, as the crisis is blamed on impure souls in their midst. Fortunately, by that point I will be very, very far away from Oklahoma. Otherwise, crusifiction seems like a very likely fate for me.